Thursday, 30 January 2014

I'd love to..

About a year ago me and Pete were sat opposite a couple of friends and the subject turned to travelling.. both of them had travelled, had stories to tell.. and both of their faces lit up talking about favourite cities or things to do in certain countries.  We sat and listened, mesmerised and then I heard myself...

"Ohhh I'd love to travel... but..."

I'd actually been saying that sentence for 10 years.  And I totally meant it with all my heart.  I would love to travel.. but it's that word getting in the way again.. BUT... "but I might get a really good acting job.. but we have debt.. but we have a house.. but we have a business.. but we want to buy a bigger house.. but we haven't got enough money.. but we've got too many responsibilities.. but we've got too much stuff.. but we might want to start a family.. but.. but.. but..

I think I'd actually started to believe all this and somewhere in my head I had told myself.. well.. maybe it's just what other people do.  We'd love to travel but we won't.

But... you know what?  This year... WE DID.

In the past 12 months we've been to Morocco, Dublin, Sydney and New Zealand and this year we're heading to New York.. back to New Zealand and then we've got the West Coast of America, Canada and possibly India on our list... actually I'm kind of up for going EVERYWHERE!!

It's 100% happening and I'm so, so happy and excited but what changed???

Well.. we stopped saying but.

Everything that stopped me from doing something, stopped me because I wanted it to.  Every 'excuse' I was making for not going travelling was because at that time in my life I was choosing to put something else first.  I was prioritising.. and although I genuinely would have loved to go travelling.. I just didn't want it enough.

Once we decided that travelling was our top priority we started to make practical steps to make it happen.  We're in the process of selling our house.. we're moving back to my Parent's house so we can save our ass off.. we're storing ALL our stuff and we're slowly going to sell a lot of it (or maybe all of it).. and we've set aside time at the end of 2014 to around March 2015 to go.. :)

And I totally understand that these aren't small changes and aren't necessarily easy to do.. I TOTALLY get that.. but that's kinda the point.  Sometimes the big things need big changes.. or big sacrifices.. but we only get one life right??

On the same topic... whenever we sit and chat with any new couples that are planning their wedding.. sometimes the conversation turns to what we did for our wedding.. and we explain that we legally got married in the afternoon with only 20 close friends and family.. then had dinner on a canal boat.. and then told everyone that it was my 30th Birthday party that evening and when they arrived we surprised everyone with a wedding.. oh.. and the evening party was the 'Enchantment Under the Sea' Dance from Back to the Future... :)

The first thing most people say when they hear about our wedding is.. "Ohh I'd love to have a wedding like that.."... and then even if they don't physically say it.. I hear the 'but'... and there's probably a lot of them.. "but our Parents wouldn't approve.. but we've started organising it.. but people wouldn't get it.. but it's not a 'wedding'.. but we couldn't see each other before the ceremony.. but that's what other people do'... but.. but.. but..

..but what?!?!?!  WHAT DO YOU REALLY WANT TO DO?  There are LITERALLY NO rules.

It took us a while to eventually get married because we never felt happy with what we thought were our options.  It felt too strict and not us.. but as soon as we realised that actually.. we could just do whatever the hell we wanted.. like literally.. what we wanted.. that's when we had the freedom to just go for it.. and all we did was take away the 'but'.. :)

So I suppose this post is mainly about listening to what you really want... what, in your heart do you want to do... what do you want to prioritise?  What are you going to look back on and think.. 'Hell yeah.. that was bloody awesome.. yes I had to sacrifice something but what I got instead was INCREDIBLE AND MINDBLOWING AND WONDERFUL!!'.

Do you want to travel?
Do you want to live in another country?
Do you want to start your own business?
Do you want to be a photographer?
Do you want to have your wedding day EXACTLY how you want it?..

All these things are big, big decisions.. but take away the 'but' and they all might just be possible.. :)

We wanted to show you guys a  little home video of our wee camper trip across NZ back in November...

Thank you NZ for giving us the space and the complete visual awesomeness to help us finally get rid of those last few 'buts'.. :)  Oh and a big thank you to Streets of Laredo too for giving us the perfect soundtrack to every adventure yet to come..

Emma & Petes New Zealand Tour from Emma Case on Vimeo.

Music by the wonderful Streets of Laredo (Homeless)


  1. Great post! I'dlove to feature some of yoru travel photography on the new blog if your are interested? xxxx

  2. sigh.....just every word of this <3 much love to you both

  3. This massively resonates with me Emma. Its an amazing feeling when you realise that theres only one person holding you back. All of sudden you have this freedom at your feet that you've been searching for! Having begun our travels last year with a month in Japan, we plan to do San Fran, Spanish Alps, Thailand and Malaysia in the next year... all with little 'buts' pressing at our ears and the constant drag of self inflicted commitments. We don't feel like we're sacrificing anything anymore, we are just walking away from each experience with complete eyes open and beaming smiles. Life is for the taking, I say yes to making your own rules.

  4. I love this! I know I'm the main person stopping me from doing stuff - I guess it's just getting over the fear of all the things that come after the 'but'! Sounds like you've got some awesome times ahead of you!

  5. Love this, that little tiny word 'but' gets in the way of so much life stuff. Good on you for being brave enough to just get out there and do what you really want. <3

  6. We want to have a wedding BUT we are put off by the awkward dancing/dj/disco after.
    We are having a movie night, mainly because I am a movie geek and Dan hates dancing! The family think we are downright weird but hey, its not about them and personally, we can't wait!

  7. wow, what a post. Thank you for truly making me THINK. I say BUT way too often, sometimes it's because I don't want it but sometimes it's just because I'm scared. Awesome video, now i really DO want to go to NZ.

  8. So, so good to read. Thank you. I have been getting myself in such a muddle recently thinking of all the wedding stuff we need to pay for, getting down on myself about the fact that we don't own our own house yet and won't be in the position to buy one for a while, feeling guilty for letting myself have a good time and spend some money on fun stuff over the past year... this is exactly what I needed to hear! But we've stopped to take stock on the wedding stuff and have got rid of some of the things that we didn't need that weren't that important to us and saved hundreds of pounds in just a few minutes! It's important to get a bit of perspective sometimes, remember you're not having a wedding to impress your guests or people who will look at the pictures on Facebook. And one day we will buy a house, and I'm sure it will be great when we finally do, but we can't put our lives on hold until we do. Thank you.

  9. Emma Case, I think I love you just a little bit more after reading this post. It's so wonderful that you are Pete are living your dreams...enjoy every second of it.

  10. Emma. This post is brilliant.

    I sit and think often about stuff like this what if, what, what WHAT and you know what? I made the decision to go from full time in my well paid career to part time to help in my husband's photography business. We don't go out as much now. We are pretty poor really but you know what. We are happy. I get to now see my daughter and take her to school which I haven't ever been able to do and next year I am jacking in totally.

    I think sometimes you have to trust your instincts and go for it. If it doesn't work then what the hell....You just try something else.

    Good Luck to you and Pete. You can tell quite clearly from the video that you are both so very happy :-)


  11. Yes yes yes perfect! Hurrah! And exactly why there was a Gonzo Fist on my wedding invites and my wedding car is my faithful bmx. You only live once.

  12. I LOVE this. You two are a breath of fresh air.

  13. Yes. You could wait a life time waiting for the perfect circumstances to do x/y/z. Biting the bullet is scary but if you listen to the what ifs, you'll only regret it later. Me and my Pete have moved in with friends to save money and we're hopefully of to Indonesia for a month at the end of this year. You only get one life, don't you?

  14. oh YES, your words are a perfection. I am glad things is going well for you two and that you don't let buts to be in the way of what you really want to do.

    Katrina Sophia Blog

  15. This blog post is basically perfect. My husband and I say but way too much, we were lucky that we got to travel a lot when we were younger but then when we got home we both threw ourselves into work and buying a house and despite wanting to travel more we kept saying 'but' too... However, we finally made a trip to Mexico happen on NYE and we had a big massive talk about what we actually want to happen in our lives and yes our businesses and working lives are important to us but in 10, 20 years time not travelling more is the thing that we would regret. 2014 is already shaping up to be quite different, and I'm excited! PS - we lived in NZ for a year and on my gosh, your video is beautiful and makes me SO homesick for NZ. Such a beautiful country. We did the helicopter up to to the top of the glacier too, and I remember being at the top and taking silly pictures and just being completely happy. So thank you for bringing all that back to me :)

  16. Hello! Totally agree. I know this is very bad blog comment etiquette BUT I wrote a very similar one the other day you might be interested in! I'll link it - obviously feel free to not publish, just thought you might like it!

  17. Oh dear Emma and Pete! Loved this post - loved the sentiment and the video and the beautiful writing. Travel will never disappoint you - it might tire you and challenge you and even make you feel broken at times, but it will never truly disappoint because to travel is to willingly open yourself up to possibility and the unknown and that will push you to find and become truer versions of your (already pretty awesome) selves. Hoping to see you many times in your travels both at home and abroad. Much love and support to you both!

  18. Wow!!! really nice, amazing work . Here is one of my work, if you want you can see it.

  19. Amazing. I love the words, watched the film and at the end of it I looked at my reflection in my iPad .........and I was smiling. X

  20. Hey Emma and Pete, what great plans!!! check out they have really sweet deals on round the world tickets... my husband and I always book our flights to Australia there and we're really happy with the prices :-)
    love xo

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